I know this is my family problem and it is absolutely personal. Some people might say I shouldn't share it on the net, but I just want to mark down this disappointing period in my life for remembrance.
I have a teenage sister who is 16 years my junior. I'll just refer her as S here. Because S is so many years younger, hence from the day she was born I was practically the person (apart from my mom) who took care of her, guided and taught her from the first time she stood up, took her first step, her first word and many more `First time' in her early years of growing & learning.
I've taught S to be good manner and polite and to respect people, young or old. She was very adorable as a baby, a child and she was well loved by everyone. She is also very talented and has a brain for business even when she was very young. She loves drawing and I must say that she has the gift. And she used to made use of old junks, and came up something new and she even sold some of her creations to her ex-classmates.
S was a bundle of joy and she was also the daughter (among the 3 siblings) who had the closest relationship with my dad, so, naturally my dad loves her most (not that I mind). I love her a lot and we used to have a very close bonding until she became a teenager.
And then, everything of S changed and despite of what we have done (she is 15 years old now) things (she) just continue to get worst. My parents have scolded her, tried advised her nicely and myself have tried talking to her as a big sister and buddy, and all that have failed.
Even though we are 16 years apart, I was a teenager once and I've been through almost the same as S but neither myself nor my 2nd sister, J (she is 6 years my junior) ever gone beyond control.
Yes, you can say time changed & many things changed, teenagers these days are confronted by many temptations but then again, that shouldn't be used as an excuse to justifies any misconduct. We had different kind of temptations & pressures from friends too during our time and ultimately it's depends on individuals. People can always tell you what to do and what not to do, but we are the one who choose the path, good or bad, we have to make our own decisions and own up whatever consequences it may be. We have to be responsible for our own decisions & behaviors.
It is mostly my mom's fault coz she'd spoilt S too much. She gave in to S and even helped S to kept secrets and lied to my dad. No one took the necessary measure and things already got out of hand by the time I was informed. I've told my mom, I'm married and I'm no longer staying with them, thus there is only so much I can do by advising S but other than that, it is entirely up to my parents to put the control and restriction.
Don't think this is the case where my parents controlled too much that leads to S rebellious behavior. Frankly speaking, my parents always give us a lot of freedom. Both J & I did abused it sometimes but we did feared of our dad and we dind't dare to challenge his limit.
In the contrary, S fears no one. All she cares about is to go out and have fun with her friends. She does not want anyone to restrict her in any way. She thinks she should be allowed to go out till as late as she likes, sleep over at whoever's house and not come home for days as she pleases and we as parents and sisters shouldn't utter a word. That's what she wants. As a teenager at 15 (or rather since she was 13 years old) she feels that it is too much for us to ask of her when we told her that she can go out during weekend but must be back before 12 midnight or occasionally 2a.m. (subject to approval) for special occasions.
S always thinks that she doesn't need the parents, the family; she truly believes that she can be independence and her friends will always be there to help her as long as she asks for help. There were many things she did that really hurts the family but it is too personal to share thus I'll omit the details.
My dad has chased S out last week and he declared to disown this daughter. He loves her most among the 3 of us, thus her behavior has hurt him the most and I know he is gravely disappointed with her. She has also hurt me so deep because I'd nurtured her & taught her many things in the past. This is not how I've imagined her to be.
And for my mom who has been putting so much hope on S, hoping that S will take care of her when she is really old (this is another part that sadden me as my mom didn't think of J & I will take care of her) until she gave in so much to S n let her do whatever she wanted. Needless to say, she was badly used and manipulated by S to get the things she wanted.
We have done everything we could but in the end it is still up to S to decide how she wants her life to be and what she wants to do with her future.
There is really no point for us to say anything further as S has shuts all of us out whenever we try to talk to her. Even though she sat there all she heard from our mouth was noises, she has stop listening long ago.
Since my dad has chased S out, I think this is a good chance for her to realizes that she can't survive on her own without proper education and without any help from the parents at this age. And her friends will not be there to help her for long since now she will need money for a roof and food to eat. And I hope my mom will not give her any money behind our back.
Some of you might feel that we are too harsh or heartless coz S might end up being lure into doing something bad like selling drugs or selling herself in exchange for money, but you can't expect us to give in, go to her and say “Do as you please but please come home”. This will not help her coz if we do that, she will only becomes worst.
I'm not giving up on S yet and I hope that she will comes to her senses soon and returns home for good.
If she has to learn the hard way, so be it.
It's all up to her now…
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
26
Remember the time when I started my countdown to year 2008, it seems like there’s still a long way, but, hey, we're officially down to another 26 days to 2008.
Well, the first 3 quarters of year 2007 were definitely not to my favour coz I’ve injured my leg in February and spent the next 6 months moving around with crutches and only get to go to places with wheelchairs facility. But as it’s enter the last quarter, things started to get better as my leg is 80% back to its normal function, I managed to made a short trip to Singapore last month. And the best thing is, I’ll be going to ShenZhen mid Dec!
This is actually a business trip but since the air fare is paid for, me & a few colleagues will extend our stay and we plan to explore the shopping areas in ShenZhen & Hong Kong.
Since Christmas is like 4 days away when I return, I reckon there will be no time for me to shop for presents here, hence, I’ll do all my presents quest in Hong Kong.
I’m feeling very excited as I’ve never been to Hong Kong before, but it will be better if Keith could join me. Well, we can always plan our own trip next time since Air Asia always offers exciting low rates.
There were fair shares of good & bad things but overall I would say I have learned a lot & gained a lot even from the bad experiences.
From the way I see it, there are many more good things to come, even though I do not know my fate in my company yet (my company has been acquired by another company and my position is sort of repetitive), apart from that everything seems promising and I do feel great about my future.
Whatever it is, I’ll do my best in everything within my control and the rest…I’ll just leave it to God…
May the Lord bless you always my friends!
Well, the first 3 quarters of year 2007 were definitely not to my favour coz I’ve injured my leg in February and spent the next 6 months moving around with crutches and only get to go to places with wheelchairs facility. But as it’s enter the last quarter, things started to get better as my leg is 80% back to its normal function, I managed to made a short trip to Singapore last month. And the best thing is, I’ll be going to ShenZhen mid Dec!
This is actually a business trip but since the air fare is paid for, me & a few colleagues will extend our stay and we plan to explore the shopping areas in ShenZhen & Hong Kong.
Since Christmas is like 4 days away when I return, I reckon there will be no time for me to shop for presents here, hence, I’ll do all my presents quest in Hong Kong.
I’m feeling very excited as I’ve never been to Hong Kong before, but it will be better if Keith could join me. Well, we can always plan our own trip next time since Air Asia always offers exciting low rates.
There were fair shares of good & bad things but overall I would say I have learned a lot & gained a lot even from the bad experiences.
From the way I see it, there are many more good things to come, even though I do not know my fate in my company yet (my company has been acquired by another company and my position is sort of repetitive), apart from that everything seems promising and I do feel great about my future.
Whatever it is, I’ll do my best in everything within my control and the rest…I’ll just leave it to God…
May the Lord bless you always my friends!
Monday, November 26, 2007
Lazy...
Have not update my blog for many days.
I've read, heard and witnessed many things happening in my daily life and I had the urge to post it up. But somehow, my fingers are too lazy to move and my brain refuses to work too.
I've been sitting in front of my PC everyday after work watching drama series, play games and surf the net, but I'm just too lazy to pen (or type) my thoughts.
Before I left my office today, my colleague called me "Lizzie the Lazy". Hahaha.... ya ya..I'm feeling real lazy these days man. Guess must be too tire after the long day work, hence after work, all I want to do is to laze around and not do any thinking & typing.
Let me laze around for a few more days ya..... I'll be right back on track......
I've read, heard and witnessed many things happening in my daily life and I had the urge to post it up. But somehow, my fingers are too lazy to move and my brain refuses to work too.
I've been sitting in front of my PC everyday after work watching drama series, play games and surf the net, but I'm just too lazy to pen (or type) my thoughts.
Before I left my office today, my colleague called me "Lizzie the Lazy". Hahaha.... ya ya..I'm feeling real lazy these days man. Guess must be too tire after the long day work, hence after work, all I want to do is to laze around and not do any thinking & typing.
Let me laze around for a few more days ya..... I'll be right back on track......
Thursday, November 15, 2007
A Nite with Peter Pan
Went to Istana Budaya to watched the Peter Pan musical play last night.
It was really entertaining. I love every part of it! Coz, it brings back a lot of childhood memories.
All kids grow up, except one, Peter Pan!
For the benefit of other people who plan to see this play, I prefer not to disclose anything as I do not want to spoil it for anyone. After all, there are enough coverage on the play in all major papers already.
It is really worth the money and time to spend 2 hours with Peter Pan and gangs together with your family and/or friends!
I totally felt like I was in Neverland during the 2 hours and how I wish I could fly with Peter Pan and ThinkerBell and other fairies (I can do this in my dream I suppose).
You can visit this link to get more information about the play.
http://www.axcess.com.my/s_peterpan.asp?id=3919566699487383834754221468675499421799
I believe in fairy tales....
It was really entertaining. I love every part of it! Coz, it brings back a lot of childhood memories.
All kids grow up, except one, Peter Pan!
For the benefit of other people who plan to see this play, I prefer not to disclose anything as I do not want to spoil it for anyone. After all, there are enough coverage on the play in all major papers already.
It is really worth the money and time to spend 2 hours with Peter Pan and gangs together with your family and/or friends!
I totally felt like I was in Neverland during the 2 hours and how I wish I could fly with Peter Pan and ThinkerBell and other fairies (I can do this in my dream I suppose).
You can visit this link to get more information about the play.
http://www.axcess.com.my/s_peterpan.asp?id=3919566699487383834754221468675499421799
I believe in fairy tales....
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
AWFUL
Came back from Singapore on Sunday night and reached home about 11:00pm. By then, I was awfully tire.
Woke up the next morning and went back to work. Felt like I should have taken leave on Monday so that I could sleep through to recharge. The whole day at work, felt like a Zombie.
Woke up the next morning and went back to work. Felt like I should have taken leave on Monday so that I could sleep through to recharge. The whole day at work, felt like a Zombie.
Singapore is awful. Yes, it is awfully nice. I really love it there! I was kind of reluctant to come home if not for my darling. It was whole loads of fun but I was totally spent. Felt like my tendon was about to snapped anytime coz it was being abused excessively.
This is my first time ever going for holiday without Keith. Nevertheless, it was a fun to go travel with Jaime but I have a bit of problem keeping up with her due to my leg condition but overall I was good. :) (I'm really proud of myself that I was able to walk for like 10 hours which usually my maximum endurance is 1 hour only).
Well, all I could say is that, if you are earning Singapore money, the things there are cheaper than M’sia (too bad I’m not). And you can absolutely find so many nice dresses in Singapore with reasonable price. The problem is once I convert the price to MYR, it’s just become too expensive and not worthy. So, I ended up only bought a dress.
What I did mainly was walk and walk and more walk, then shop and shop and shop. Me & Jaime walked a lot, shopping centre after shopping centre but didn’t really buy much. You should see her expression when she found something cheap. :P
Apart from shopping, we went to Sentosa Island and I got a very bad sun-burn coz I wore a tube top and did not apply sun block. Ouch! Here, let me share some pics with you guys. There were more pics I took but I accidentally deleted some of the photos while I tried to transfer the file from my phone to the PC. DAMN ME!
Apart from shopping, we went to Sentosa Island and I got a very bad sun-burn coz I wore a tube top and did not apply sun block. Ouch! Here, let me share some pics with you guys. There were more pics I took but I accidentally deleted some of the photos while I tried to transfer the file from my phone to the PC. DAMN ME!
Poh Ee is studying in Singapore so Jaime & I met up with her on our first night and had dinner at Tony Roma at Orchard Rd
Poh Ee, Jaime & Daniel in front of n.y.d.c. (New York Dessert Cafe)
They have a very nice McCafe (it's a high class McDonalds) at Orchard Rd that serve cakes and pastries
This was the chocolate ice cream cake we order with extra chocolate. But when they served us the cake, it seems like the chocolate was so little. thus, I asked the waitress to add more.
And it came back like this!
Me with the LION at Orchard RdWe went to Sentosa Island on Friday and went for the 4D Movie Magix and the Luge ride. The fare we paid was a package of Luge with the SkyTower ride, but both me and Jaime were so excited about the Luge and we didn't even bother to read what printed on the tickets. Wasted!
Me, Jaime & the awesome Merlion
This is the SkyTower we supposed to ride after the Luge (I took this photo before we headed for the Luge ride)
Well, they are the HOAX!
We are the real deal. The original Payaya Sisters have come to town!
We also stumbled into this giant BANANA...Yumm
All gear up for our Luge ride
Wow! It was real fun!
Loving It!
We made it back in 1 piece after the ride.
Me huggie the tree
So romantic, we both walked around the beach
Tired but HAPPY
At Orchard Rd. They are putting up the Christmas decors and will only lights up from 17 Nov. I was there 1 week too early. :(
This was a t-shirt selling in one of the boutique. I don't kid you. Its a new shirt and it comes in 4 colours. Talk abt 'fashion'. So if you have any old shirts & the collars starting to look like this, make sure you don't throw it away, ok. It's fashion, man!
Like I mentioned earlier I accidentally deleted some photos so no more photos to post up. :(
But I would like to thank my darling for insisted me to go for this trip and let me shop as I like (but I did spent wisely and carefully). He said maybe will bring me there again next month.
Well, I'm looking forward for it already!
Chao...
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Hi SINGAPORE!
Yay! I'm going to Singapore tomorrow for a 4 days 3 nights trip. I'll be catching the Aeroline Coach from 1U. This will be my 2nd trip to Singapore. My 1st trip was like some 8-9 years ago.
This is actually a what you call the 'spur-of-the-moment' kind of trip. ;o)
How all this came about was, Keith & I were trying to asked our friend (his ex-gf), Jaime to go for a drink last Friday but she was unavailable. They chit-chatted for a while and Keith mentioned that he is going to Korea next Thursday (as I type this post, Keith already left for KLIA as he is catching the midnight flight). Then Jaime was very excited and thought of going to Korea together if I do coz she has plan to go to Singapore (her hubby has been posted in Singapore to oversee a project) but she find it boring as her hubby will be working and not able to accompany her around.
Keith suggested us to go to Singapore together instead as the air fare to Korea cost RM2.8K and stuffs in Korea are so expensive. So, might as well go to Singapore as it is much more economical. I can buy lots of stuff with RM2.8K in Singapore.
Then Jaime proposed to have me to go to Singapore with her since Keith will be away for 4 days. And TA-DA!!!! Keith agreed straight away and called me and told me about it.
I had to make the decision immediately as she needed to buy the bus ticket the following day. I was truly panic as I did not see it coming. Things happened so sudden!!!!
I was contemplating my responsibility at work as I have reports to write. But it is an opportunity hard to turn down because I don't have to worry about the hotel expenses coz we'll bung-in to her hubby's room. Sorry la..I know I'll become the lamp post for the next 3 nights, but what to do? :P
Luckily my nice boss approved my leave and I managed to rush off my reports on time today. So tomorrow I can go in peace (hmmm...) why sounds like ppl pass away one?! Choy-choy-choy! TOUCH WOOD!
I've to pack and sleep early tonight. I'll write about my trip after I'm back!
Singapore! See U tomorrow!
This is actually a what you call the 'spur-of-the-moment' kind of trip. ;o)
How all this came about was, Keith & I were trying to asked our friend (his ex-gf), Jaime to go for a drink last Friday but she was unavailable. They chit-chatted for a while and Keith mentioned that he is going to Korea next Thursday (as I type this post, Keith already left for KLIA as he is catching the midnight flight). Then Jaime was very excited and thought of going to Korea together if I do coz she has plan to go to Singapore (her hubby has been posted in Singapore to oversee a project) but she find it boring as her hubby will be working and not able to accompany her around.
Keith suggested us to go to Singapore together instead as the air fare to Korea cost RM2.8K and stuffs in Korea are so expensive. So, might as well go to Singapore as it is much more economical. I can buy lots of stuff with RM2.8K in Singapore.
Then Jaime proposed to have me to go to Singapore with her since Keith will be away for 4 days. And TA-DA!!!! Keith agreed straight away and called me and told me about it.
I had to make the decision immediately as she needed to buy the bus ticket the following day. I was truly panic as I did not see it coming. Things happened so sudden!!!!
I was contemplating my responsibility at work as I have reports to write. But it is an opportunity hard to turn down because I don't have to worry about the hotel expenses coz we'll bung-in to her hubby's room. Sorry la..I know I'll become the lamp post for the next 3 nights, but what to do? :P
Luckily my nice boss approved my leave and I managed to rush off my reports on time today. So tomorrow I can go in peace (hmmm...) why sounds like ppl pass away one?! Choy-choy-choy! TOUCH WOOD!
I've to pack and sleep early tonight. I'll write about my trip after I'm back!
Singapore! See U tomorrow!
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Doesn't Really Matter
Me & Keith got ourselves a tattoo each at this place called 'Borneo Ink' in Sri Hartamas last week.
I thought of posting the picture of our tattoos here but I'm afraid people might start copying the designs. Because, by right tattoo is a very personal thing, so whatever you tattoo on your body it should be something unique, personalised and it should carries a special meaning to that individual.
But, these days, many people are doing it because it is an 'IN' thing so it has become meaningless and we certainly don't want others to spoil it by copying our design.
Well, I did a naked Butterfly Fairy at the back of my right shoulder. I really love it very much. The reason why I tattooed a Butterfly Fairy is because firstly, I love insects, secondly, butterflies signify 'Transformation' and it is a benchmark for me of the transformation I've gone through over the years especially in this year itself. And, of course the Fairy represents myself.
However, my eldest sis-in-law asked me a question yesterday evening (as I'm writing this after midnight) whether I ever worry that what if when I wear something that display my tattoo some parents might come and question me or scold me of showing 'pornography' as their children might be curious & anxious to know what's on my back.
Errr...... I did thought about that question but then.... like I care! It's my tattoo and it is on my body, so no one has the right to question me. Pornography or not, well, to me it is a form of art, thus, there's nothing to be shameful about. Many famous and great painters also painted naked women portrait, so can anyone scold them or question them why they draw naked women? NO. Coz it's ART and you don't view it in a lustful way. Furthermore, I think women's curves are to be admire and its definitely a great piece of art created by God Himself.
So, it really doesn't matter to me. If some people find it offensive then just don't look at it.
If any of you are interested in getting a tattoo but not sure where to go to, I strongly recommend Borneo Ink. They are very professional and their workmanship is very very nice as long as you are willing to pay the price.
And one more thing, they are quite arrogance (usually artistic people do have their own attitude and ego) but if you are easy going then they would be very nice also. But, if you try to be nasty, then be prepared to face the consequences. They are nice people, just that they would not entertain or tolerate any non-sense.
You can check out their website at http://www.borneoink.com/main.html
I thought of posting the picture of our tattoos here but I'm afraid people might start copying the designs. Because, by right tattoo is a very personal thing, so whatever you tattoo on your body it should be something unique, personalised and it should carries a special meaning to that individual.
But, these days, many people are doing it because it is an 'IN' thing so it has become meaningless and we certainly don't want others to spoil it by copying our design.
Well, I did a naked Butterfly Fairy at the back of my right shoulder. I really love it very much. The reason why I tattooed a Butterfly Fairy is because firstly, I love insects, secondly, butterflies signify 'Transformation' and it is a benchmark for me of the transformation I've gone through over the years especially in this year itself. And, of course the Fairy represents myself.
However, my eldest sis-in-law asked me a question yesterday evening (as I'm writing this after midnight) whether I ever worry that what if when I wear something that display my tattoo some parents might come and question me or scold me of showing 'pornography' as their children might be curious & anxious to know what's on my back.
Errr...... I did thought about that question but then.... like I care! It's my tattoo and it is on my body, so no one has the right to question me. Pornography or not, well, to me it is a form of art, thus, there's nothing to be shameful about. Many famous and great painters also painted naked women portrait, so can anyone scold them or question them why they draw naked women? NO. Coz it's ART and you don't view it in a lustful way. Furthermore, I think women's curves are to be admire and its definitely a great piece of art created by God Himself.
So, it really doesn't matter to me. If some people find it offensive then just don't look at it.
If any of you are interested in getting a tattoo but not sure where to go to, I strongly recommend Borneo Ink. They are very professional and their workmanship is very very nice as long as you are willing to pay the price.
And one more thing, they are quite arrogance (usually artistic people do have their own attitude and ego) but if you are easy going then they would be very nice also. But, if you try to be nasty, then be prepared to face the consequences. They are nice people, just that they would not entertain or tolerate any non-sense.
You can check out their website at http://www.borneoink.com/main.html
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